sorry!

Sorry for not keeping up for the past 4 months! Here is life as it stands right now. Currently i am in NEW ZEALAND!!! I never thought i would get here yet here i am. spiritually i am growing but at the same time i feel a cave in. Right now we have been here for 5 weeks. I am getting into a serious state of introvertedness... thats right the side of me that none of you tend to see is rearing its ugly face. i am currently sitting out side the back of the house all the blinds around the windows facing where i am are closed. I love it here though the sky is currently covered with fast moving clouds and its a nice blue hew and a touch of pink. i am hungry for more of God at the time and i pray that that hunger continues. I do miss my one on one times with people back home. There are families i miss more than ever right now and things i wish i could be back for. wow that was amusing i have no idea what just happened but there was girls screaming and pans crashing and clanging in the kitchen just now. Any way back to what i was saying. life here is so busy we really have no down time and now that i am on housekeeping i have NO freetime to do anything anymore. I still need to do one on one time with my small group leader and come up with a plan for our group time on wednesday but i have had no time to do that. I honestly have no idea an i am just living life second by second here. I got to call my grandma for the first time since i have been here and that was the greatest thing ever! I not only got to talk to her but my Great aunt and uncle Kathy and Jim. It was great convos and i do miss them. Its odd having been in school for a little over a month and hearing about all the little kiddos from back home starting up preschool and elementary school or even middle and high school. I have been in contact with those starting college and its hard to be honest. i do wish i was back home at points. I would love more than ever to be there when my sister walks through the door this week home from the marines. Yet at the same time i know what God has called me to do with my life and that also puts a bit of fear in my life in a good way though. I like knowing im going in the right direction in my life right now and i know my calling beyond right now but this right now is preparation for what is to come. I honestly dont know if and when i will come back to the states. I am officially here as of now till dec 27th but that looks like it may change if all this keeps up.